yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
