Umm I'm too high to move.
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Randomize
