Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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