I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
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