Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
