You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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