We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
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Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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