That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
