Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And the cops told us we were all naked.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize