Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
there is puke in my bra ... again
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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