nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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