You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
