hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
