god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize