Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
