i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
