There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Randomize
