I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
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