People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize