I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize