Umm I'm too high to move.
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
