why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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