Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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