i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably