At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
