these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
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