butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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