The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Randomize
