its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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