do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
