I don't think brook has ever known best
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
