Whod you bang
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
