there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Come see our sink grown plant.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
