Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I've blown a few things in my day
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
