Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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