it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
i need to put some appletini on your dick
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
