They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
