I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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