State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Watching her eat just hurts me
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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