O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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