I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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