I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
