why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Randomize