What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
