I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
