Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
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