There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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