I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize