Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
