i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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