butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
